Arranged marriage

Ever since Avi posted Gambit's Pawn on AKN, it has spawned a humorous exchange on arranged marriages. Here are two verses that offer the perspective of the bride and father of the bride. The intention is to look at the institution of arranged marriage in a lighter vein.

The setting...an unsuspecting man has been lured by family to visit the house of a prospective bride. There a family album is thrust before him and through innuendos, the family tries to persuade him to give a positive feedback regarding the match. The man calls it an attempt to fix his marriage "by stealth."

Now read on...

Scene 1

The face in the album was pretty

and before he could blink

an aunt turned towards the kitchen door

and summoned with a wink.

No longer a mere face in the album

soon the entire person appeared

with tray laden with tea and samosas

It was just as the poor chap feared!

He knew he was outnumbered

by mistresses of the game

He had a sinking feeling and

hoped she was feeling the same

But she was perfectly calm and cool

pouring tea with steady hand

and a little voice warned in his head

"Ab tera to baj gaya band!!"**

And all the while the pretty face

was thinking how she must

soon write to cousins and tell them

"Another bachelor bites the dust!"

Scene 2 :a wedding toast...

Whether check or stalemate

The bachelor’s fate

Was sealed on that trip

And all watched his blood drip

As he was led on a halter

To the sacrificial alter

And ‘just married’ chimed the bong

At the wedding meal

The bride's father with zeal

Raised a toast to the pair

And said - "I’d like to share

A momentous feeling

From which I am reeling

Coz’ to hide it would be wrong

After all these years

I have finally managed my dears

To take my lovely girl’s hand

On which shines the wedding band

And move it from MY PURSE TO HIS

I cannot fully express my bliss

For this I have waited so long!!"

(**Tr: 'you have been done for')